The year is 2003.

The World Trade Center in New York has been leveled by terrorists. The Soviet Union has been broken up and its pieces sold to the highest bidder. There is talk of returning the Statue of Liberty to France.

Jesse 'The Body' Ventura is the former governor of Minnesota, and Arnold Schwarzenegger is a serious contender for governor of California.

The Attorney General of the United States is a Pentecostal preacher.

Ozzy Osbourne and Isaac Hayes have their own sitcoms.

The United States of America, never firmly anchored, is rapidly slipping the bounds of reality.

Soon, the American people will be ready for a leader who isn't merely an actor or a fake, but an entirely fictional character.