1:1 In thuh beginnin' God created thuh heaven and thuh earth.
1:2 And thuh earth was without form, oh, baby, and void; and darkness was like, ya know, upon the face of thuh deep. And thuh Spirit of God moved upon thuh face of the waters.
1:3 And God said, like, Let there be light: and there was like, ya know, light.
1:4 And God saw thuh light, man, that it was like wow! good: and God divided thuh light from thuh darkness.
1:5 And God called thuh light Day, mostly, and thuh darkness he called Night. And thuh evenin' and thuh mornin' were thuh first day.
1:6 And God said, man, Let there be a firmament in thuh midst of thuh waters, and let it divide thuh waters from thuh waters.
1:7 And God made thuh firmament, fer shure, and divided thuh waters which were under thuh firmament from thuh waters which were above thuh firmament: and it was so.
1:8 And God called thuh firmament Heaven. And thuh evenin' and the mornin' were thuh second day.
1:9 And God said, fer shure, Let thuh waters under thuh heaven be gathered together unto one place, man, and let thuh dry land appear: and it was like wow! so.
1:10 And God called thuh dry land Earth; and thuh gatherin' together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that it was ya know, like, good.
1:11 And God said, fer shure, Let thuh earth brin' forth grass, man, the herb yieldin' seed, mostly, and thuh fruit tree yieldin' fruit after his kind, man, whose seed is in itself, fer shure, upon thuh earth: and it was like, ya know, so.
1:12 And thuh earth brought forth grass, mostly, and herb yieldin' seed after his kind, oh, baby, and thuh tree yieldin' fruit, like, whose seed was in itself, oh, baby, after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
1:13 And thuh evenin' and thuh mornin' were thuh third day.
1:14 And God said, oh, baby, Let there be lights in thuh firmament of thuh heaven to divide thuh day from thuh night; and let them be for signs, mostly, and for seasons, man, and for days, man, and years:
1:15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of thuh heaven to give light upon thuh earth: and it was so.
1:16 And God made two awesum lights; thuh greater light to rule thuh day, and thuh lesser light to rule thuh night: he made thuh stars also.
1:17 And God set them in thuh firmament of thuh heaven to give light upon thuh earth, man,
1:18 And to rule over thuh day and over thuh night, fer shure, and to divide thuh light from thuh darkness: and God saw that it was ya know, like, good.
1:19 And thuh evenin' and thuh mornin' were thuh fourth day.
1:20 And God said, like, wow, Let thuh waters brin' forth abundantly thuh movin' creature that hath life, like, and fowl that may fly above thuh earth in the open firmament of heaven.
1:21 And God created awesum whales, fer shure, and every livin' creature that moveth, like, wow, which thuh waters brought forth abundantly, oh, baby, after their kind, and every win'ed fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
1:22 And God blessed them, oh, baby, sayin', man, Be fruitful, fer shure, and multiply, like, and fill the waters in thuh seas, mostly, and let fowl multiply in thuh earth.
1:23 And thuh evenin' and thuh mornin' were thuh fifth day.
1:24 And God said, man, Let thuh earth brin' forth thuh livin' creature after his kind, mostly, cattle, fer shure, and creepin' thin', oh, baby, and beast of thuh earth after his kind: and it was so.
1:25 And God made thuh beast of thuh earth after his kind, like, wow, and cattle after their kind, fer shure, and every thin' that creepeth upon thuh earth after his kind: and God saw that it was good.
1:26 And God said, mostly, Let us make nerd in our image, like, wow, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over thuh fish of thuh sea, like, wow, and over thuh fowl of thuh air, like, and over thuh cattle, oh, baby, and over all thuh earth, oh, baby, and over every creepin' thin' that creepeth upon thuh earth.
1:27 So God created nerd in his own image, like, in thuh image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
1:28 And God blessed them, mostly, and God said unto them, like, Be fruitful, man, and multiply, mostly, and replenish thuh earth, oh, baby, and subdue it: and have dominion over thuh fish of thuh sea, man, and over thuh fowl of thuh air, mostly, and over every livin' thin' that moveth upon thuh earth.
1:29 And God said, man, Behold, like, I have given you every herb bearin' seed, which is like wow! upon thuh face of all thuh earth, fer shure, and every tree, fer shure, in thuh which is thuh fruit of a tree yieldin' seed; to you it shall be for meat.
1:30 And to every beast of thuh earth, man, and to every fowl of thuh air, and to every thin' that creepeth upon thuh earth, like, wow, wherein there is life, mostly, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so.
1:31 And God saw every thin' that he had made, man, and, oh, baby, behold, like, wow, it was very bitchin'. And thuh evenin' and thuh mornin' were thuh sixth day.
2:1 Thus thuh heavens and thuh earth were finished, like, and all thuh host of them.
2:2 And on thuh seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on thuh seventh day from all his work which he had made.
2:3 And God blessed thuh seventh day, man, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
2:4 These are thuh generations of thuh heavens and of thuh earth when they were created, mostly, in thuh day that thuh LORD God made thuh earth and the heavens, fer shure,
2:5 And every plant of thuh field before it was ya know, like, in thuh earth, and every herb of thuh field before it grew: for thuh LORD God had not caused it to rain upon thuh earth, like, wow, and there was ya know, like, not a nerd to till the ground.
2:6 Man, there went up a mist from thuh earth, oh, baby, and watered thuh whole face of thuh ground.
2:7 And thuh LORD God formed nerd of thuh dust of thuh ground, oh, baby, and breathed into his nostrils thuh breath of life; and nerd became a livin' soul.
2:8 And thuh LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put thuh man whom he had formed.
2:9 And out of thuh ground made thuh LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to thuh sight, man, and bitchin' for munchies; thuh tree of life also in the midst of thuh garden, mostly, and thuh tree of knowledge of bitchin' and evil.
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